Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

the oracle on #dating (?)

New Year with the Oracle ... Since 2000, I have known the Oracle.  "Congrats, Oh Mighty Oracle, for your MBA-ness!"

For more than a decade, the Oracle has provided intellectual banter, often about business development, yet regularly relating to professional and personal development. Past mouth-spew-wisdom has been featured in a previous post over here.

Oracle Favorites

A few of my fave wisdom words include -
  • right is always right; not simply when it's obvious or convenient. 
  • no one wins a race to the moral bottom. 
  • you are the sole architect of your fortune ... and misfortune.
  • creativity is intrinsically hard to manage, but there is an essential paradox whereby enough process must be introduced so that creativity is balanced by a certain level of accountability. 

Economics and On-Line Dating

Earlier this week, we caught up on what's what, including chats about holiday activities, family, work, etc. Virtual "high five" for the Oracle's MBA (and more free time)!

Because I turned 50 this past year, I mentioned that I have agreed to try an on-line dating site - ourtime.com - that markets to those 50 years and older. (OH! THE REALITY OF LIFE!) I have yet to post a profile.
 
Immediately, the Oracle mentioned a Bloomberg Surveillance clip came to mind - a clip of a Stanford professor interviewed on Bloomberg TV over here on How Economics Can Help Find Love Online. Paul Oyer wrote a book - Everything I Ever Needed to Know About Economics I Learned from Online Dating - with an overview over here and a companion video (below).

enjoy this clip from Stanford Business (over here)

y'know ... i'm just thinking 
it's about fish in a barrel -
being a truthful fish in a barrel
(is that an economics thing?)





 

 

Sunday, October 20, 2013

when #AARP meets #birthday #dating

do the math ... last year when my friend pho queen was giving me dating advice, i declared in august 2012 that I would be 49 years old. 

(SQUEE) 
yes, it's an 
appropriate response.

fifty ... yes, this year (and in fact, this month) i am turning 50 years old. 

  • i have been to my 30th high school reunion. 
  • i am at the AARP target market age. 
  • i am generally good-to-go with 80s trivia (and maybe even some 70s trivia given the 13" television set my brother and i adored and the teenage magazines i LOVED!).
  • i saw madonna's the virgin tour when i was in college, for which i also experienced the beastie boys for the first time.
    • and while i am at it, i stared up at andy bell's (of erasure) red-costumey-leather-jockstrap-thing from the floor of san francisco's I-Beam when concerts were under $15. (fun time during them I-Beam nights!)
  • my genes (and moisturizer) keep me looking youthful. 
  • i definitely have to stretch more than before, and whether it really helps, i take a multivitamin religiously.
  • i had to REALLY think about whether it was a good idea to hook-up for a two-night stand with a younger guy - because making bad dating decisions is a timeless, ageless thing - aka 1503 ...  remember this, piragua?
july 8, 2010
1503. 
  • i read (and have read) dr. christiane northup's women health writings since i was told my eggs would start "rotting" (aka being less viable).
  • i appreciate (for the most part) when other people SQUEE when they learn i'm turning 50.
  • i thank bouncers and age-checkers for not carding me.
  • and finally, i know how to spell perimenapaws perimenapause perimenopause. 

back to the dating thing ... last year pho queen (who is approaching mid-30s in a few years) had silver-lining advice for dating older and dating younger men. 

this year, pho queen and i still talk about dating, sex and the city episodes, old school ways of meeting guys, and scary-shitty on-line dating. (yes, this means she and i are single.) now piragua (a mutual friend, also single, also in her 30s) has posed the question - 

"have you signed up for our time?"
~ piragua

fuck. shit.
i'm turning 50.




Sunday, August 5, 2012

no merpes on-line

dating ... yes @ecosmiley @jenimvt & pho queen - thanks to pho queen's facebook challenge comment about my recent haircut -
"you should go on a date and get laid with your new haircut. no merpes"
~ pho queen
- this pumpkin will join in on-line dating (again), with one of my mini-goals of no merpes (of course).

dating blog fodder ... stay tuned for shares and insights i gain from the experiences and date tidbits (e.g., phone chats, email exchanges, impolite remarks made, being encouraged to exit a slowly moving car, etc.), however, there will be no names (but maybe monikers) and no pictures (but maybe my cartoon renderings). 

i am older than pho queen ... i will be 49 years old in october, math and time tell me i will hit  F I F T Y  next year. no ex-husbands. no kids. no jail time. no comas. no around-the-world travel. single. back in march 2011, i shared celebrating age as part of yvette francino's 2011 the love project. (and actually, yvette, has been a columnist/dating adviser at examiner.com)

pho queen is just over 30 (not quite yet in her mid-30s), yet she also is well-versed on the '80s - which keeps our conversations fresh (for whatever fresh '80s means).  as part of thinking about age and dating,  back in 2011, pho queen shared her words of wisdom (with a bit of tongue in cheek) with me - her thoughts about my dating older (vs. younger) men -
  • a lot of experience in the bedroom (sookie sookie)
  • higher maturity level (hopefully!)
  • is looking to "settle down" with you (hopefully!)
  • if a divorcĂ©e with kids, kids will likely accept you because they are >18 yrs old ("adult kids")
  • think willem dafoe status ... he could be hot
  • he's a writer/blogger extraordinaire!
  • he thinks penguins are cute, too
  • he lives in the east bay somewhere
- and yes, pho queen ALSO has words of wisdom about dating younger men. will save that for another post.

think it matters - older or younger men?  
what say ... do share.


Sunday, February 12, 2012

got mortified ...

THANKS @mortified @thefreezesf ... mortified (on web, facebook, twitter) and the freeze (on web, facebook, twitter, youtube)  made for great chuckles yesterday evening at your doomed valentines show in berkeley! so awesome for people to share their stories and totally awesome for the improvised hip-hop after each story-teller.
image from: getmortified.com ... go there NOW!
more about mortified ... a jaunt through mortified's site includes nice mortified FAQS about participating with participate FAQs, and most importantly, their upcoming events.

yesterday evening ... i'm glad my friend debbie thought of me for the evening jaunt with her husband and her. dinner at gather (on web, facebook, twitter), mortified at shattuck down low (on web, facebook, twitter) and licky-treats at gelateria naia (on web, facebook, twitter). after the show, i shared a few under 20-years old and over 20-years old dating stories with my friends. now i'm gonna hunt down my high school and early college pack-rat-writings!
my search begins ... i'll be seeking out my childhood-ish scribbles. for better or worse, i know in 2006 (when i moved from SD to BA) i had a ritual burning of letters written during my late teens ... and although not within the mortified age range of 5-20 years old, a TOTAL shredding of letters and cards from a prolific writer boyfriend back when i was 21 and from a my-ex-girlfriend-was-not-found-guilty boyfriend back in the late '90s. nevertheless, i kept a couple of scrap books and little diaries here and there written during high school and college. i also wrote letters to girlfriends. AND i also wrote poems. (OH HOW I TRY TO FORGET about the my calligraphic-lyric-writing of "endless love" to the first one. ewwww.) 

boy2.0 list ... for kicks, i am recreating a "list" i started on my rest-in-peace-blackberry - a list that listed boy-stuff; this list shall be boy2.0. (this list is NOT to be confused with the "men of ...fill-in-the-blank..." calendar lists i have also made.) the original boy list included everyone i remember kissing (and then some, PG-13, R, and soft X), along with symbols indicating if i thought i was in love with that boy, and if he was a shitty kisser (imho).*
  
licky-treats chit-chat ... short version - over gelato and sorbetto, i shared a few college-dating-ish stories and post-college stories with my friends.  and most notably (and a bit horrifying), i shared three stories about dating during '88-'90 (which puts me in my mid/late 20s).

my gal pal stupidicus, for i was moronicus
the stupidicus era ... my three stories can be corroborated (sadly yet likely much more entertaining) by my dear friend and super gal pal affectionately known as stupidicus. here are three stories that are quite abridged (as they should be) ...
  • the dmv guy ... i met him at a dance club (and stupidicus was there). over the course of a couple of weeks, we (finally!) got to 2nd base (kinda), and i later found out he had a fake i.d. - in other words, uhm ... he kinda was REALLY (and i mean REALLY!) young (like WRONG YOUNG!). how i found out? completely unbelievable work-related-ish connection.
    (thanks, stupidicus, for laughing WITH me. right?)

  • jerr-bear ... my art class partner and i went to dinner at paragary (kinda cool adults-drink-wine kind of place) jerr-bear told the waitress to "top it off" (my wine glass, that is) and insisted it was necessary to remove the shell before eating ... that would be the shell of the soft shell crab. later during his good night kiss attempt, jerr-bear also tried to run his fingers through my hair. tried ... because my spiral perm was so unruly that there were little matted/knotted parts. did that stop jerr-bear? no, he really, REALLY kept trying to complete that task. ouchie!
    (thanks, stupidicus, for the serendipitous interruption call - mind you, on a land line, so i HAD to get up to pick up the phone!)

  • b&b metalhead guy ... such a sweet guy from a blind date that consisted of a progressive date - progressive because if at any phase it was going not-so-well, game over(!). the phases ... dinner (6:30 reservations), desert (by 8:00 at the diner), and dvd (by 9:00 and nearly sure-fire 1st base). short version, a total HE said/SHE said sparring. yes, we kissed goodnight, and then our stories diverged.

    the sparring began ... HE said tongue; SHE said no tongue. HE totally had a kind of love-at-first-sight. SHE totally had a you-are-totally-cute-yet-scare-me-a l'il-but-i-don't-know-why moment. HE sent her a spring bouquet of flowers at work. SHE eventually used the lame excuse that the long-distance phone call thing between us was a no-go. HE countered with very reasonable solutions to make it work. SHE made him sad. THEN ... SHE 2 months later, started seeing someone who lived even farther. HE found out under quite unbelievable 1990's-spring-training-walk-out circumstances while i was with the OTHER HE. SHE drank too much. HE ignored her. the OTHER HE was ... well, that's another story with many subplots (part of the WB #3 spiral perm era).
    (thanks, stupidicus, for  giving me the 2.5 blocks-of-walking-home "tips" (nudge-nudge) before i met the OTHER HE, going up to random strangers at john wayne airport, and letting me cry my eyes out over the OTHER HE. i appreciate that you are NOT blackmailing me.)
... and of these 3 stories, two guys were asian and one was white. why is this relevant? it's not really, but i figure i'd give myself an excuse to post pics from boys of the past - in this case, two white guys and one asian guy.

now for the boy2.0 list-making
(oh, excel spreadsheet, 
how handy you will be)
and the teens and post-teens diary-hunting
*i learned late last year when i was contacted via a facebook reconnect, 
i FORGOT i dated him in college. bad shirlnutkin. bad. 
(add him to the boy2.0.)


Monday, April 25, 2011

happy hour gamer dude ...

metroid ... completely unrelated to my little chiang post (over here) but about the virtual world (enough so), when i came across chiang's story, it was shortly after a friday happy hour. i asked a t-shirt wearing guy what the logo on his shirt was all about.

[image from surecords.com]


rather than directly answer my question, here is the boring chatter dribbled (with a VERY FEW embellishments because it was pretty boring) -
  • me: hi ... what's that symbol on your shirt?
  • t-shirt guy: do you play video games?
  • me: not as often as you probably play them. so what's the icon all about on your shirt?
  • t-shirt guy: well, if you played video games ...
  • me: really?! maybe you can just tell me. does it count if i read books, sci-fi books?
  • t-shirt guy: no. and read?!
  • t-shirt guy's friend: dude, just tell her already. dork.
  • me (also thinking "dork"): uhm ... yeah, just tell me.
  • t-shirt guy: metroid. look it up on wiki.
  • me (to his friend): uhm ... right.
  • t-shirt guy: hmmm.
  • mike (my friend): hmmm. let's go eat - caffee sport.
uneventful as that chat was, i did learn about metroid (via wiki), being the curious person that i am. although it has NOTHING to do with chiang's story, there is the virtual world aspect ... and perhaps a lame an opening line to trying to pick up on meeting someone - with a pop culture t-shirt or any shirt.

excuse me, is that a hipster plaid shirt? or just a shirt?

(okay ... i just wanted an excuse to post a pic of the t-shirt.
reminder - no need to ask that question again.)



Tuesday, March 1, 2011

#love2011: random thoughts for week 9

celebrating age ... this week 9 love project assignment is allowing me to take a little short-cut and combine week 9 with dating.

but first, my random thoughts ... i've been thinking not only about celebrating age (my prime age) but the ritual of celebrating other recurring events, such as anniversaries, memorials, work anniversaries. those that come to mind have the more common measure of years past. i'm giving thought as to what are the other celebratory milestones that are NOT measured annually. still thinking beyond celebrating the end of a semester in college ... the second date that leads to a third date and possible fourth date ... others?

dating ... meanwhile, this morning i listened to yvette's sunday evening interview on the dating market place with nic & neely while getting ready to head to cubeopolis. it's a quick, informative and fun interview!

ah-ha ... celebrating dating and age! enjoy my little flashback to this past mid-january ...

and the outcome, by the way, was not a peep or acknowledgment from the 41 year old. however, i have since contacted a few other men younger than me. (note to self ... step up the meeting people.)

as for the flip side of dating someone older, i've done so back in the day when i was younger. i've met a few men who are older than me.

enjoy these reasons to date an older man
(from my 30-year old friend),
which means a man 48 years or older.


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

#love2011: gathering week 8 thoughts

reframing rejection ... this week 8 love project assignment on reframing rejection is giving me a little nudge to continue rolling over old blog posts (from 2006-2009) into girlnutkin.

as mentioned in yesterday's post about the week 8 assignment -
"... from rejection, i have found i experience moments of writing emerge. little epiphanies pop-up, and reminders of lessons learned peek around the corner. the main thing is that i MUST acknowledge these moments. so that means i write, acknowledge mini-epiphanies, and learn a few lessons."
(pic of my friend todd, because he will cut you!)

flashback rejections result in writing ...
dating - a common topic of rejection. and so the story goes -
  • in early 2007 ... i dated a man for a couple of months, for which we spent at least 4 days a week with each other amidst home-cooked meals 2-3 nights a week and a full weekend day of personal projects, errands, and date night to cap it off. then we broke up, and i was VERY SAD. then i wrote about it.
  • in the spring of 2008 ... my ex-boyfriend emailed me; we reconnected and started dating again - on and off throughout the rest of the year. then in early 2009, we broke up, and i was VERY SAD. then i wrote about it.
  • in winter 2009 ... my ex and i agreed to be just friends. we saw imogen heap at the fillmore. fun. i was clear on the "just friends" after the concert; he was not. he later poo-poo'd my not hanging out with him after the concert, however, we remained friendly. several weeks later, after wishing him (via telephone) happy holidays/new years, he divulged that even before he and i met and dated, he was in a long distance relationship and the woman he was seeing was staying with him.
  • it's 2011 ... we will not reconnect. it's mutual.
writing to express my feelings ... for each of the little milestone break-ups, i have discovered my go-to of writing to express my feelings. and
  • in 2007 ... i wrote my foreigner. this short little story actually started off as an email. i don't remember at what point i decided to throw it into a story. i think it was after i got tired of listening to myself, burdening my friends, crying, and just spending way too much time on a treadmill of sadness. the result? - self-discovery, as shared in the story.
  • in 2009 ... i wrote let me believe. like my foreigner, this story started off as an email. and when i spoke to a few friends about this "round 2", i kept saying that i could not believe what happened - again. well, as my friend, reggie, shared during one of my "i'm-sad-for-myself and i-want-to-talk-about-it-more-than-i-should and maybe-i'll-heal-but-for-now and blah-blah-blah pity-party" ... reggie said, "girlfriend, believe it!" and then poof - let me believe was written. i read this outloud for nearly 3 weeks straight.
lessons and transitions ... in reframing rejection, i believe i did learn more about myself and relationships through the break-ups -
  • from my foreigner, as shared in the story, i learned about ignorance. my thoughts were shared in a may 2007 post (reposted over here). and this has since resulted in my being very interested and exploring race, ignorance, knowledge as shared over here.

  • from let me believe, when i read it now, i have learned the importance of communications - spoken and unspoken, and although it all may sound like a cliche, i have a choice ... i have choices - how to react, how to transition, how to heal, etc.
friend shares support ... i do remember my sadness, shock, anger, and confusion back in 2007. and i am reminded of a quote sent to me in april 2007 from my friend tracy ...
Confronting our feelings and giving them appropriate expression always takes strength, not weakness. It takes strength to acknowledge our anger, and sometimes more strength yet to curb the aggressive urges anger may bring and to channel them into nonviolent outlets. It takes strength to face our sadness and to grieve and to let our grief and our anger flow in tears when they need to. It takes strength to talk about our feelings and to reach out for help and comfort when we need it.
- Fred Rogers
from "The World According to Mr. Rogers"
thanks, love project,
for my moments of flashback.
awesome lessons learned and learning!


Wednesday, February 16, 2011

f|break: mid-week nooner

check yourself ... thanks to my girlfriends who left little support notes - and snarky tidbits - about an on-line okcupid guy who dissed me via text msg before we even met. yes, giving that internet dating site stuff a try, along with actually meeting new people through friends and fun stuff i do. back to the on-line thing this weekend - i should say, i wasn't bummed so much more so surprised. so this fiber break is an almost-date story and a fiber break.

(side note on posting about dating: i wasn't going to post this little, mild tidbit, but i figure i needed to step up the dating stuff. a friend recently scheduled a lunch for me with a guy she wants me to meet - sweet. in addition to yvette's lessons of love from a laptop dancer, i'm digging this guy's it's not a match, so we'll see what dating yip-yap stories may make it on to girlnutkin. from the past, enjoy my friend's perspective about photos to post and then some, my IJAM experience (aka it's a lotta-money-for-a-lunch-scheduler), breakfast buds musing over on-line dating, the booty call (aka 1503 among friends), and stuff white people like and apparently asian girl - me - like).

back to this past weekend ... after about 2.5 email exchanges (because - well, those doing on-line, you know what i mean about the 0.5 email), i called him (because how many times can a guy include his phone number and email addy? one answer: 2.5 email messages). the call and the aftermath went something like this ...
  • saturday morning
    • me & him (aka 2.5 email msg guy or 2.5 emg): yip-yap, blah-blah, you seem fun, thank you, you're welcome, chuckles, using big words with lots of syllables, jibber-jabber, blah-blah.
      • 2.5 emg: chit-chat, yip-yap, i gave you four stars! i don't give stars out very often. jib-jab, blah-blah.
        (note to self: that's 4 out of 5 stars; where's the last star? how seriously do people take that star? oh right! it's kinda like yelp, ebay positive feedback, and like-kind, right?)
      • (apparently, after more yip-yap-blah-blah, we passed each others' gatekeeper & keymaster that a face-to-face made sense)
    • me: yip-yap, blah-blah, may go to farmers market in your area tomorrow, i'll call you later tonight, jibber-jabber, i may go to my friends rum party, blah-blah.
    • 2.5 emg (after phone call is over): text message - you have a great day (or something like that, and i can't remember if there was a smiley face.)
    • me: thnx.
      • (turns out, i didn't go to my friend's rum party. i cranked on a bunch of other cubeopolis and home stuff and yhd2011. i completely did a CYCCL (clean your closet, change your life) moment on my room and on about 3/4 of my kitchen. i took a power nap. i caught up on my dvr shows. i did some writing, reading, and 'rithmetic (bill paying).)
      • (and when it was 11:30 pm, i remembered - oops, forgot to call 2.5 emg. i'll call him in the morning at about 9AM, because any earlier is - EARLY for many)
  • sunday morning
    • me (up by 4 AM): tip-tap, click-clack, writing blog posts, commenting on websites, exercise, checking the time, home stuff, cubeopolis stuff, more exercise.
    • me (at 9 AM): looking for my phone. gotta text that i'll be heading to farmers market. i hear it chirp. it's my phone. found it!
    • 2.5 emg text message (at 9:00 AM!): Thanks for keeping your word and calling back. One thing I value is honesty! Your loss!
    • me (at 9:01 AM): i did a quick double-take at the irony, chuckled, and proceeded to email my girlfriend, harold's girl, at 9:13 AM. and then i realized - 2.5 emg still had a keymaster of which i was not aware.
as i told a few girlfriends ...
"well, at least he didn't capitalize ALL THE WORDS. he seemed normal on the phone and on email. he is right - i didn't call back last night. i guess i should include on my okcupid profile that i can be forgetful and flighty?"
(btw, 2.5 emg dude ... you scare me - which means you probably scare others. i'm not easy to scare. not in the YIKES, run for your way ... in the ewwww way.)

flashback fiber break with ice cube (over here)
for ~ 5:28 minutes with R-rated, UNCUT.
(if you don't want to hear curse words and then some,
do NOT view. skip to next clip for 6 seconds of G-rated.)


"check yourself before you wreck yourself"

and the recent movie, due date, brought that line back (over here)
for ~ 6 seconds with zack galifianakis

"you better check yourself before you wreck yourself"



Saturday, January 22, 2011

f|break: saturday morning

no asylum?! ... bummed. SO VERY BUMMED because i'll miss me my's emily "a woman's perspective" but WAIT! she is still around (on facebook for updates) and will be doing the next incarnation as "ask a lady." with that said ...

back story ... here are the last few masterclash perspectives on asylum's bye-bye ...

NOW - enjoy your fiber break with
emily' FINAL woman's perspective (over here)
for ~ 1:30 min on premature ejaculation

"... a little dab will do you"
"i've got a dvr and that sandwich in the fridge
is not going to eat itself"
"... less about duration and all about efficiency"

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

"when i saw he was 41 years old ...


... i came to grips with my age -
i'm 47 f*cking years old."


these are the words that came out of my mouth during a conversation two evenings ago with my girlfriend, pho queen, as i continued with my mini-fun-(obvious)-a-ha-moment rant. she and i (along with piragua) are trying out an on-line dating site. pho queen and piragua are in their early 30s.

mid-life-ish .. so i don't know if i'm peri-menopausal, but who knows and who cares? (not rhetorical) i have an answer or three - my guess? - some of the guys doing on-line dating. another guess? - anyone that wants a baby mama or just babies, from his loins - to my ... , so to speak. me? not a likely candidate at this point in my life. and yet another guess? ... guys who think 47 is too old for them. your guess?

so begins the mind-yippity-yap ... given my youthful spirit, various interests, and genetics (aka the asian gene) for which i often am mistaken for much younger, i am proudly 47 years old. and so states my on-line profile. i don't have anything against my age, and as much as there are often intended-to-be-kind statements such as, "but you are so (fill-in-the-blank with some nice-nice as if late-40s people don't own certain character traits except for the old stuff), so it's NOT like you're REALLY 47." nope, i'm really 47. (and note to self: sometimes, I AM THE DORK that makes those intended-to-be-kind statements. dork.) and i'm no longer (haven't been) in the optimal child-bearing years, and i'm fairly realistic. baby mama or mama ain't in my cards in this life. and as i've read, there are adventures in delicious dating after 40 as i approach my second adulthood (where 50 is the new fifty).
a little kick-in-the-butt ... to get over myself, pho queen and i exchanged words of encouragement yesterday afternoon as we scrolled through "dates" forwarded to my email - prospects, if you will. and then i asked if she'd pull together reasons for why i should initiate contact with someone younger than (or same) 47 years old based on something in his profile - and here are her criteria for me to consider (on action runner note paper, even!) -

my take on pho queen's list for shirlnutkin ... to break it down to its essentials - location, looks, shared interests, and/or relationship bound (vs. hook-up bound) - these are my overall take-aways. and i found the "east bay" criteria interesting, because i know it's not one of my criteria, but i do know it's definitely a criteria for others. for now, i'll spare my mini-fun-rant about the bridge and tunnel mentality of SF and east bay ... or SF and peninsula ... or SF and marin ... or SF and ... get it?
side note: get booked + love2011 + and yhd for 2011 ... back in march '10, i wrote a post (aka get booked) about different on-line sites i've tried or supported friends. and i like the get booked philosophy - to meet, a little sooner than later. also, recently, i came across yvette's book, laptop dancer diaries (plus my yvette fan-speak post and her the love project for 2011). so dating and relationships are on my mind and is #4 in my yhd for 2011. and given i am still lagging on love2011, i do know that love2011's week two assignment is -
"What are you going to do in 2011 to bring more love (see note below) into your life? What goal-setting techniques and resources are you going to use to make that happen?"
my commitment to pho queen and myself ... i will initiate contact with a younger guy, i will transform my mind-yippity-yap into more supportive yippity-yap, and i will minimize feeling like i have to have a shoe up my ass to get in gear.

and i will get booked.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

on-line for face-to-face dating ...

looks like it feeds into the
philosophy


how about we ...
looks to be a streamlined version of on-line dating - actually getting to eyeball-to-eyeball sooner than later. (a little gq article over here and other press) a couple of us are giving it a whirl. keep you all posted.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

just #love2011 it! weekly fun throughout the year ...

love2011 or the love project for 2011 ... is yvette francino's brain-child. yvette (who's signed copy of her book (thank you, yvette!) arrived earlier this week) launched the love project for 2011 on new year's day - a weekly assignment designed to give and receive love ... based on a monthly theme. she shared a little tidbit of the brain-child on her new year's eve blog post -
"I'm copying Gretchen Rubin's Happiness Project idea. I'll blog and learn about love and write a book about it. ... This one will be completely non-fiction and will not reveal the mysterious details of my own love life. ... I chatted with Gretchen briefly and got her thumbs up for me to go ahead with my project and I have some fun stuff in mind... Prompts for bloggers (similar to reverb10), a "website of the week" segment, themes, videos. Stay tuned for more information!"
weekly resources ... each saturday, wednesday and friday, you can count on the following -
  • saturday - the weekly assignment is shared
  • wednesday - website of the week feature
  • friday - funny post
  • throughout the week - "how to's" and other shares
and keep in mind, the weekly assignments are based on a monthly theme. this first month (or two) is self-love.

be curious about love2011 ...
here are links for you to check-out about this week's launch of the love project -
to journal it or to blog it? just love2011 it! ... it is never to late to join the love project for 2011. although i am a little late starting-up, my posts/assignments will shortly be rolling out on the girlnutkin blog. if you blog and choose to join, let me know because it can be fun having love2011 accountability buddies! if you just want to follow my weekly assignments, let me know - it's good to know that you may be checking in.

if you don't blog, it's okay - read on ... after mentioning this to friends who love the love project 2011 idea but do not blog, i do believe non-bloggers can also be part of the love project 2011. here are a couple of ideas:
  • personal journal ... use your personal journal (e.g., hard bound book, paper notes, private on-line journal, index cards, whatever!) to jot down your thoughts about the weekly assignment. given the first week's video assignment, shy? if you're shy about sharing, you can still create a video for you to personally reflect. or maybe just take the opportunity to do a little self-reflection.
  • facebook and the notes page ... facebook has a "notes" page that can serve like a journal of sorts. you can customize who can see your notes page - your friends, other love2011 participants, yvette, friends of friends, etc. ...
  • coffee (or tea) talk, chat amongst yourselves, and scribe ... each weekly assignment will be thought-provoking enough to chat amongst yourselves - from quippy tidbits, to personal experience, to major epiphanies - whatever coffee talk results, talking about giving and receiving love is timeless ... and maybe among you is someone who can shoot a little note over to yvette.
  • tweet a little ... maybe you are on twitter and you have followers (friends and strangers) who may be interested? let them know about the love project - what you are doing, what your friends are doing, what yvette is doing ...
  • photographs ... maybe you love taking photos and it's how you share your thoughts and ideas. part of flickr's 365 or something similar? throw in a little love2011 into your mix. or maybe start your own 365love2011 photo journal.
  • got other ideas? ...
just let yvette and others (and me) know... you're lovin' the love project. drop by her blog - lessons of a laptop dancer - and make sure to let her know how it's going for you, questions or suggestions you have, or ideas for nifty weekly assignments.

lovin' the love project for 2011
(aka love2011)


Wednesday, January 5, 2011

f|back (jul '08): as if i'm white (?) ...

... but with smooth skin. (context, please)


here's the context - during this evening's commute home, i hands-free-talked with sci-fi guy (of reverb10 ordinary joy fame) about how he has enjoyed my blog posts (and i how i have enjoyed writing them). we spent some time yapping about fmk frivolity. major props to sci-fi guy for coming up with (... wait for it. wait . for . it . )
(BRAVO!!!)
(tangent) then somewhere along the way, sci-fi guy said he thought i may still be hung-up on a past boyfriend. not-so-much, however, this reminded me of a post i did a couple of years ago - about dating - i am asian, i have dated caucasian men, and because of those experiences, i have 3 little tidbits to share. 
(repost from July 8, 2008 - with a bit of editing only to delete some of the "non-dating" related items.)
well, turns out, i learned (a while ago) that i'm not white. but today, i've got some info that may prove this otherwise ... at least figuratively. (but that comes in later posts)

... so here is what got me excited for my trek to the bus terminal after work. (the bus has wi-fi.) yesterday afternoon, after receiving some text messages from friends up north (... and constantly anxious for things to blog about, for some inspiration, whatever) - along comes THIS over my blackberry:

stuff white people like
and on the list of 104 items* (where you'll find #104 under the "top posts" section) ...


#11 - asian girls! 

my duty, as an asian girl (so i thought) ... was to make sure my mac was charged up enough so i could surf a bit and learn what in fact was/were that "stuff" ... and so i surfed and surfed and surfed on the bus ride home, while typing up the first 1/3 of this post. 

back to the list ... the list is rich with things to ponder and add and comment and laugh and ...?! after checking out the list, it appears i am either (a) white people or (b) i simply like the same stuff that white people like while i am part of the #11 crowd. 

looking back - let's see ... so as part of passing my time yet ANOTHER way, i'll write a bit here/there about how i can relate to some of the "stuff" and i'll start with an easy one - 

i, an asian girl (AG), dated a white boy (WB) here and there back in the day. in other words, i have been a data point for a few WBs (again, refer to #11), as well WBs providing little stories for me to tell through the years. 
here are three WB memories.

WB #1a: "what's a filipino? your last name is mexican, but you look chinese. is filipino mexican and chinese?"
(for my engineer friends, in mathematical terms, does f = m + c?)
[context: 3rd year in college. boyfriend. cute. smart - but taking up
a little bit of space in the relatively prestigious university
for someone else who knows that filipinos don't look chinese (!)
- we look japanese or hawaiian!!! DORK!]

WB #1b: "AYshen girl hahb berry, berry shmoooojjj shkeen. white girl hahb berry, berry hruff shkeen. shmoooojjj AYshen shkeen!" (spoken while rubbing my forearm as if he was polishing silver)
[context: WB #1 attempting to speak with an asian-ish accent.
why? how the f**k would i know. but i put up with it.
i mean, it was college.]

WMom of WB #1: (WMom greets me pleasantly.)"good to meet you, finally. WB #1 son tells me you are filipino." (WMom turns to WB #1) "WB #1, remember when we lived on guam? we had filipinos? they are such nice people."
[context: standing at WB #1's parent's doorstep,
being introduced to WB #1's mom.
WB #1's Mom's doorstep. an actual porch attached to a ranch-style house,
that was part of a private golf community. clearly WMom was lying.
if she really meant it, why didn't a filipino butler answer the door?! ]

WB #2: "mmmm ... look at that asian p***y."
[context: not spoken during a gynecological exam.
not spoken while looking at asian p***y
on a screen (porn). not spoken about pet or stray siamese cat.
actually spoken during a lust-filled moment of a little petula.
that said, unless WB #2 was going to hand me a mirror or take a picture,
i wasn't going to be looking at anything, any time soon,
thank you very much! (OUCH! TMI)]

WB #3: (aka "the runt" or the bay-city-roller-wannabe) rather than pick a choice quote, the defining #11 moment for WB #3 was at a jazz concert (bobby caldwell and some saxophone dude). let's set up the scene of nearly 17 years ago ...**

... my boyfriend (not a WB) and i were unknowingly walking in front of WB #3 who was with his current AG#1. (important tidbit - my boyfriend was WB #3's former roomie.) WB #3 grunts behind us and says, "i thought i recognized that handsome couple!"

and as we turned around, it was VERY CLEAR (PAINFULLY) that AG #1 could potential sport the nearly same, 1990s big-hair, spiral-perm, chaka-khan, rae dawn chong hair that i was sporting. boyfriend and i were polite, chatted, and took our seats (for which WB #3 was several rows ahead of us).

then, my boyfriend noticed across the concert hall, another gal, AG #2. turns out,
AG #2
(also with big-hair) was an ex-girlfriend of WB #3. apparently, AG #2 was the ex with a bit of a fiery temper.

and THEN during intermission, there was an AG #3 siting - yet ANOTHER ex-girlfriend (with moderate big-hair) of WB #3. yeah ... WB #3 had three ex-AGs at this concert. yellow fever? or four AGs attracted to a runty WB (at some point in time)? granted, WB #3 was a charming, cute little fellow. but what a bummer for that ride home.

AND WTF?! curiosity, patience and a little google-stalking ... with a dash of my lame-ass mock-faux-photoshop-prowess. i found this little article after google-stalking WB #3 by name and by the name of a plastic ball with holes in it. go figure - someone scanned some old newsletters in. (thank you, mr. man who did that.)

smooth skin, over and out for now.*


*on 07/08/08, there were 104 listed items.
there are currently 134 listed items.

**the pic? from '90. no, i do not know where WB #3 is;
yes, i'm thinking WB #3 would not come across this blog.
if he does, meh.


Saturday, December 18, 2010

f|break: saturday morning

double feature fiber break ... asylum's emily* on baby-free/condom-free and manscaping, all within ~ 3-minutes plus. (bonus!) at least a little pg-13 or more, for some - just sayin'.

a friend of mine is going to a singles event with two others. of course, i cautioned her (as i always do about random-suck-face moments) to watch out for "the mherpes" - and then, i thought of emily - who has quick perspectives that we single women may enjoy. along with mherpes, consider staying away from baby-making, and if you must tell tales of your weekend, start your story off either with "... rubber chicken" or "... a tangled ball of yarn" -

have fun gals!
(details...)

enjoy a fiber break of less than 2 minutes of
a woman's perspective on birth control (over here)

"boner hating scientists"
"... impromptu gynecological exams ..."

enjoy a fiber break of less than 2 minutes of
a woman's perspective on manscaping (over here)
"pubic jungle down there ... "
"plus when you get razor burns and in-grown hairs ..."

a couple more tidbits for educational purposes from askmen.com


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...