Wednesday, January 12, 2011

"when i saw he was 41 years old ...

... i came to grips with my age -
i'm 47 f*cking years old."

these are the words that came out of my mouth during a conversation two evenings ago with my girlfriend, pho queen, as i continued with my mini-fun-(obvious)-a-ha-moment rant. she and i (along with piragua) are trying out an on-line dating site. pho queen and piragua are in their early 30s.

mid-life-ish .. so i don't know if i'm peri-menopausal, but who knows and who cares? (not rhetorical) i have an answer or three - my guess? - some of the guys doing on-line dating. another guess? - anyone that wants a baby mama or just babies, from his loins - to my ... , so to speak. me? not a likely candidate at this point in my life. and yet another guess? ... guys who think 47 is too old for them. your guess?

so begins the mind-yippity-yap ... given my youthful spirit, various interests, and genetics (aka the asian gene) for which i often am mistaken for much younger, i am proudly 47 years old. and so states my on-line profile. i don't have anything against my age, and as much as there are often intended-to-be-kind statements such as, "but you are so (fill-in-the-blank with some nice-nice as if late-40s people don't own certain character traits except for the old stuff), so it's NOT like you're REALLY 47." nope, i'm really 47. (and note to self: sometimes, I AM THE DORK that makes those intended-to-be-kind statements. dork.) and i'm no longer (haven't been) in the optimal child-bearing years, and i'm fairly realistic. baby mama or mama ain't in my cards in this life. and as i've read, there are adventures in delicious dating after 40 as i approach my second adulthood (where 50 is the new fifty).
a little kick-in-the-butt ... to get over myself, pho queen and i exchanged words of encouragement yesterday afternoon as we scrolled through "dates" forwarded to my email - prospects, if you will. and then i asked if she'd pull together reasons for why i should initiate contact with someone younger than (or same) 47 years old based on something in his profile - and here are her criteria for me to consider (on action runner note paper, even!) -

my take on pho queen's list for shirlnutkin ... to break it down to its essentials - location, looks, shared interests, and/or relationship bound (vs. hook-up bound) - these are my overall take-aways. and i found the "east bay" criteria interesting, because i know it's not one of my criteria, but i do know it's definitely a criteria for others. for now, i'll spare my mini-fun-rant about the bridge and tunnel mentality of SF and east bay ... or SF and peninsula ... or SF and marin ... or SF and ... get it?
side note: get booked + love2011 + and yhd for 2011 ... back in march '10, i wrote a post (aka get booked) about different on-line sites i've tried or supported friends. and i like the get booked philosophy - to meet, a little sooner than later. also, recently, i came across yvette's book, laptop dancer diaries (plus my yvette fan-speak post and her the love project for 2011). so dating and relationships are on my mind and is #4 in my yhd for 2011. and given i am still lagging on love2011, i do know that love2011's week two assignment is -
"What are you going to do in 2011 to bring more love (see note below) into your life? What goal-setting techniques and resources are you going to use to make that happen?"
my commitment to pho queen and myself ... i will initiate contact with a younger guy, i will transform my mind-yippity-yap into more supportive yippity-yap, and i will minimize feeling like i have to have a shoe up my ass to get in gear.

and i will get booked.

1 comment:

  1. You go, girlnutkin! Yeah, definitely go for a younger guy! If you marry someone 8 years younger than you, then statistics say you'll die at the same time... What could be more perfect?

    (For the record, though, my attempts at being a cougar proved to be the most embarrassing, (hence most people's favorite) part of my book...)

    And thanks for participating in my Love Project. Yippee! I'll include you today on Website Wednesday!


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